Would You Do It to a Child?

Beyond Obedience: If Dogs Are Like Children, Why Are Force, Fear, and Pain Still Normal in Pet Care?

Studies in canine cognition continue to radically shift how we understand dogs. No longer merely trainable companions, they are now recognised as emotionally rich, socially aware beings with cognitive profiles comparable to young children—specifically those between 2.5 and 5 years of age. That insight alone should prompt a profound re-evaluation of how we interact with, train, and care for them.

But canine emotional complexity begins even earlier—before birth. A 2021 study by Groppetti et al. revealed that maternal cortisol, the primary stress hormone, can be detected in various biological substrates including blood, saliva, milk, and even the hair of both mothers and their puppies. Crucially, puppies born to stressed mothers showed significantly higher levels of salivary cortisol, both at birth and two months later (Groppetti et al., 2021). This suggests that a mother’s emotional state during pregnancy has lasting effects on her offspring’s ability to regulate stress—much like in humans.

If dogs enter the world already shaped by their mother’s emotional environment, their early handling becomes even more critical. And yet, across much of the pet care industry, forceful or emotionally disconnected handling remains common. From restraint during grooming, to punitive obedience training, to isolation-based behavioural correction—practices that would never be acceptable in childcare are still widely used on dogs, despite their emotional equivalence.

Research from Bray et al. (2021) shows that even 8-week-old puppies possess an innate ability to interpret human gestures and communicative intent—a skill level once thought unique to toddlers (Bray et al., 2021). These are not learned behaviours; they are inherited, pointing to the evolutionary design of dogs to live in emotionally cooperative relationships with humans.

And this depth isn’t just theoretical. In one study, children aged 7 to 12 described their dogs as siblings, confidants, and emotional supports—relational roles that speak volumes about how dogs function within our social world (Kokkinakis & Bibou, 2024). If children see dogs as emotional equals—and if dogs respond in kind—it raises difficult ethical questions about how we treat them.

Both dogs and children depend on safe, secure relationships to regulate stress and behaviour. Yet many dogs are still subjected to techniques we would never dream of using with children: leash jerks, raised voices, forced compliance, isolation. The physiological impact is uncannily similar. Dogs exposed to aversive handling show elevated cortisol levels, pacing, hypervigilance, and long-term behavioural changes—paralleling the effects of chronic stress in children (Kujala, 2018), (Kertes et al., 2017).

This is especially concerning in everyday settings—grooming salons, veterinary clinics, daycare centres, and homes—where handling is often approached as a logistical task rather than an emotional experience. Dogs who appear “difficult” or “resistant” are often simply overwhelmed. Like young children, they don’t need stricter discipline—they need help regulating.

Studies by Törnqvist et al. (2023) and Meints et al. (2018) reinforce this: both dogs and children gradually develop emotional literacy through repeated, safe social exposure. How they are treated shapes not only what they learn, but how they feel, and how well they trust (Törnqvist et al., 2023), (Meints et al., 2018).

Critics often argue that dogs are not children and shouldn’t be “anthropomorphised.” But that argument misses the point. While dogs may not possess full theory of mind or the same emotional range, they clearly experience fear, joy, frustration, attachment, and emotional memory. From a neurobiological standpoint, they are not machines—they are mammals with complex inner lives.

If we believe children deserve to be raised with empathy, structure, and compassion, then dogs—who perceive the world in comparably sensitive ways—deserve nothing less. This doesn’t mean permissiveness. It means choosing clarity over coercion, support over suppression, and asking not just what works, but what’s right.

Because if a being thinks and feels like a child, we must handle them like one.

References

Bray, E.E., MacLean, E.L., Hare, B.A. and vonHoldt, B.M., 2021. Early-emerging and highly heritable sensitivity to human communication in dogs. Current Biology, 31(14), pp.3132-3136.e5. Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/early-emerging-and-highly-heritable-sensitivity-to-human-2y27gt1kk6

Groppetti, A., Pecile, A., Ravasio, G., Bronzo, V. and Arrighi, S., 2021. Maternal and neonatal canine cortisol measurement in different biological substrates during the perinatal period. Animals, 11(12), p.3556. Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/maternal-and-neonatal-canine-cortisol-measurement-in-5505hgtz7u

Kertes, D.A., Gunnar, M.R., Madsen, N.J. and Long, J.D., 2017. Effects of pet dogs on children’s perceived stress and cortisol stress response. Social Development, 26(2), pp.382–401. Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/effect-of-pet-dogs-on-children-s-perceived-stress-and-270tw2146d

Kokkinakis, A. and Bibou, A., 2024. “She is like a sister to me”: Children’s lived experience with companion dogs as relationships of care and kinship. Children & Society. Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/she-is-like-a-sister-to-me-childrens-lived-experience-with-mwtkkirozy

Kujala, M.V., 2018. Canine emotions: Guidelines for research. Animal Sentience, 3(21). Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/canine-emotions-guidelines-for-research-2evxmt7iwn

Meints, K., Brelsford, V. and De Keuster, T., 2018. Teaching children and parents to understand dog signaling. Frontiers in Veterinary Science, 5, p.257. Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/teaching-children-and-parents-to-understand-dog-signaling-4hwcfr2q3d

Törnqvist, H., Hellgren, S., Sundman, A.S. and Jensen, P., 2023. Matters of development and experience: Evaluation of dog and human emotional expressions by children and adults. Journal of Veterinary Behavior, 63, pp.12–22. Available at: https://scispace.com/papers/matters-of-development-and-experience-evaluation-of-dog-and-3i7uclwoey